Before we go straight into my letter I wanted to provide some background. As most of you know I recently retired from the sport of gymnastics after a long and full career that lasted 18 years. Just like any other gymnast majority of my time was spent in club until I was fortunate enough to embark on the journey of college gymnastics which was an overall beautiful and important experience for me. My time as a college gymnast really opened my eyes to what it meant to have people care for you in the sport and I was lucky enough to have coaches that taught me what actually mattered. So, before you read this letter I want you to know that I am by no means attempting to put a negative outlook on my own career as well as any other athlete’s career who might be reading this post. I can only speak from my own experience, but these are all real things that I have had to come to terms with during my time in the sport and, to be honest most of which I couldn’t bring myself to deal with until now. After recently getting to spend some time with old teammates and young aspiring college gymnasts I felt the need to write down what I want you guys to know, and more specifically what I wish someone would’ve told me.
Dear beautiful girl,
Don’t let this sport make you harsh. Let it make you powerful and strong, but don’t allow yourself confuse a sport with your self worth. Don’t let someone or even yourself tell you you’re value is based on a score, or a number on a scale, or how many times you have fallen. You have been given an incredible gift. Don’t let anyone tell you you’re not good enough, because you are.
I’m not saying don’t love the sport. In fact I want you to love it so much it fills your heart with every emotion. You should work hard and diligently with a goal so big you have to reach for the sky. I wish for you to use you’re passion, but never let your passion be used against you.
Girl, you are and will always be extraordinary. Your body is elegant and strong. Your lines are unique and your world will not crumple because you lost a tenth in a landing. Know the difference between “that routine was not good enough” and “you are not good enough.” Don’t confuse tough love with degrading comments and manipulation. You don’t need to lose anymore weight or please any one coach, or even be perfect to that judge, you need to love yourself for the strong and fierce individual you are.
You’re dreams are never too big and your goals are never too far to reach so don’t let the voices you’ve heard or the ones in your head tell you otherwise. Don’t let anyone be cruel to your dreams and most importantly don’t be cruel to yourself. Some of the things you have heard and some of the things you say to yourself will stick with you forever so be gentle with which you choose to keep on your heart.
When you get tired learn to rest. Your body is a gift and doesn’t deserve to be beaten down, starved, or shamed. Push yourself to the limit but don’t ever allow yourself to break or to be broken. Never ever let someone tell you that you are broken. You deserve better. Obsess over your successes not you’re mistakes. Be aware of the lessons you can utilize in the real world not just the gymnastics world.
And when it ends, I hope you were kind enough to yourself to feel satisfied. You loved something so much even when it may have not loved you back and somehow you are still standing. You are made up of so much. Someone with a passion like yours deserves to be taken to more than one place. More than one dream, more than one sport, deserves your passion. Your drive, your fire is not because of a sport, or because of a coach that told you you sucked or even that same one that told you that you were talented, it is not in spite of anything you have encountered it is because of you. It has always been because of you. You are a fighter, an exquisite and flawed human being who is loved not as a gymnast but as a person. You are loved because you are you. You always have been. And you always will be.
Sincerely,
a fellow former gymnast who is learning to heal
